Charleston via I-95

Christina and I took a short road trip South down I-95 to the scenic and historical Charleston, SC. Neither of us had been there before, so our plan (by that I endearingly mean Christina's plan) was to get a flavor of the colonial history, War Between the States history, and modern Charleston by:

• Taking a boat out to Morris Island
• Visiting the Charleston Museum, America's first!
• Participating in a walking tour at night
• Touring a plantation
  
• Patronizing the South Carolina Aquarium
  

We also took in some good food, though the further South of the Mason-Dixon line you go, the harder it is to eat vegetarian at any restaurant.

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Like any road trip, our journey down I-95 was as much an adventure as roaming around our destination.

In North Carolina we stopped at the Hinnant Family Vineyards for a little bit of wine tasting. Our sommelier was a young man who told us everyone was heading to Charleston, as was he! He knew his wines, gave us 1-on-1 attention (we were the only people there...), and was overall very good to us. We bought three bottles: Tarheel Red (very sweet red wine), a white wine, and a blackberry wine (no grapes, but very alcoholic).

We also couldn't help but stop by the nearby JR store, which advertised on the highway that it's the largest doll store in the world, the largest cigar store in the world, and probably a half dozen other things. We certainly looked at dolls and cigars, but we just ate stadium-grade pretzels (no "Bone Suckin' Sauce" though) and were on our way.

It's worth noting that adjacent to the JR store is a Soffee outlet, adorned by interestingly arranged words describing the contents, much like in the JR store pictured here. Most notably, SWEATS and COLLEGE were arranged such that one might think one could acquire a degree in 'sweats' if one parks one's RV there long enough. I wouldn't put it past them.

Warning: shit gets really weird when you cross the state line into South Carolina. I suppose you don't need my warning; billboards for South of the Border start hundreds of miles into North Carolina (not kidding). Not only is this bastion of imported trinkets out of place (Mexican theme? Really?), it's just plain tacky. South of the Border is where bad eBay decisions and output from Taiwan go to die. Don't stop there. Let the following photos show you what to avoid, lest you wind up here as well:

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Ah, Charleston. A town with history, cobblestone streets, buses that resemble trolleys, and a beautiful bay.

Our first real order of business was to be passengers two aboard a wee little boat rated #1 on TripAdvisor. Captain Howie was hilarious from start to finish on our tour the bay and Morris Island. Check out the FAQ page on his site for a taste of his humor.

Christina and I got to roam an uninhabited area near Fort Sumter for a couple of hours, which we spent collecting shells and hunting for sharks' teeth. On the water we encountered aggressive pelicans and friendly dolphins. As I often lazily do, here is a generous dump of images and video:

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The Charleston museum was half historical / natural museum, and half museum about the museum. Founded in 1773, it's America's oldest museum, and proud of it. Many of the animal and cultural specimens really show off the age of the museum, with hand-written placards and the like.

If you can't tell from the photo on the right, we had a lot of fun dressing up in cunfed'rit outfits. It reminded us of simpler times, when human rights were just a twinkle in our forefathers' eyes, and labor was darn cheap. *shudder*

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The 'night tour' I mentioned was actually a pub stroll, guided by a history buff in colonial garb. Mike (our guide) wasn't in character, and drank as much as anyone else. In fact, we broke his record for the longest pub stroll he ever led, probably because it was New Year's Eve and we were all having a blast. He gave us many insights into Charles Towne (colonial moniker) goings on, from fact to legend to ghost story. We had so much fun that Mike stayed with us until after the countdown to ring in the new year, which we enjoyed at the diviest bar in Charleston. Seriously, Big John's prides itself as the "diviest bar in Charleston." There's a penis drawn on the outside of the men's bathroom door. Graffiti is encouraged...good times. Christina made a half dozen facebook friends that night.

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We ventured 10 miles or so outside of Charleston to visit Magnolia Plantation. We took the nature tram around the property and saw gators, turtles, all manner of water fowl. The petting zoo goats, deer, turkey, chicken, a reptile house, and caged foxes, owls, and raccoons. Have you ever seen an albino raccoon? Well, they have two. How about an albino peacock? Guess what, they have one of those, too! There was even a pretty cool hedge maze to keep the kids entertained.

It is rather sobering to visit a Southern plantation and see the slave quarters. The guide told us that those shacks were occupied through the 1940s by the families of former slaves, no doubt working without too many improvements to their families' standards of living in a hundred years.

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Situated right on the harbor, the South Carolina Aquarium is home to many fascinating specimens of marine life and aquatic birds, and even a rescued (flightless) bald eagle! I don't know what South Carolina's fascination is with albino animals, but there's a pretty impressive white gator at the aquarium.

Overall our adventure down I-95 to Charleston was one we won't soon forget.